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Blogs & Columns
Morality? E-mail
City Life - Blogs & Columns
Written by Ian Clark
When I first moved to Nanjing, my family couldn't quite fathom why I'd want to do it. The biggest part of the problem for Americans is the environment and economy issues here. They're confused about it now, but they were even more so back then - ten years ago. Then, Americans couldn't understand what was happening here and were even a bit afraid of China. Up to now, my living here hasn't been without a hitch.

It's true that the Chinese government does not have a war going on now, and that public transportation functions well enough to give up having a car. But there are various forms of "pollution" here. The first and most visible form is air pollution, which has had serious consequences for me to this day. At first I was a strong man in spite of the pollution, but I had tricked my system.

You Are Fat E-mail
City Life - Blogs & Columns
Written by Ian Clark
I see you before. I know. You ah a more fatter than before. I think a you eat a too much. You should a take a die. Dying make you healthy. You, you are more thinly, you sexy, is that right? You wife is Mary. You is Mary. He like a you much thinly. You should die. Literal Translation: I've seen you before, and I can see now that you've gained weight. You must be eating too much. You should go on a diet.  Diets are good for you. 

If you were thinner, you'd be more sexy. Don't you agree? You're married and your wife would really appreciate it.  You should go on a diet. Idiomatic Translation: I just paid 8 months salary just to get into this class with a foreign teacher, so I have every right to insult you, the teacher, in every way possible.

Let's agreeing, OK? E-mail
City Life - Blogs & Columns
Written by Ian Clark
Eenglisha es a eenternational language. My study Eenglisha help I meet a much a-money. I'm father she want a me study much Eenglisha. I'm don't a like eet-a. For breakfirst my eat bread and a milk. You have two heads. But a I'm like sleeping, basketballs and a footaball. I'm study many year Eenglisha, butta before I'm not a study much Chineeza.

Therefore, I'm Chinese es notta weel, but a I can heelp you, yes? I'm think you are veddy handsome a man. You have individual special. You just a came here to I'm webba page, no? But a my think that you - yes you! You es mine old a friend. Gouda friend. You understand my meaning? You teach a me Eengalisha, I teach a you Chineeza. You see? Doubly win.

I know where it is E-mail
City Life - Blogs & Columns
Written by David A. Dayton
Sometimes doing business in China is like getting in a taxi. The guy pulls up to the curb and you get it. It’s a working vehicle, probably not too old, middle aged guy driving, license on the dashboard, working meter, lights, gauges, etc.  Everything you’d expect.  You tell the guy (or show him) the address and he takes off.  Most of the time you get where your going and were only scared half to death once or twice—no actual physical or financial harm to your person.  

But sometimes you realize that he’s not going the right way.  When you know more than your driver, you can expect there to be problems.  Your questioning of his methods is usually meet with one of a couple standard answers. “Oh, you meant that hotel.”  Or. “I just know the area, I figured you’d know the building.”  Or, “I don’t know, I thought you were going to tell me.” Or, “This is a short cut.” Or “That road’s closed.” Or, in the worst cases, “If you don’t think I’m going the right way you can get out and walk.”  Either way, you know these answers mean a round-about trip to raise the price, fake money back as change or the guy running over your foot as he drives away grumbling at your poor attitude.

All for you! E-mail
City Life - Blogs & Columns
Written by Mary Higgins
You ruined my evening! Yes, you showed up unexpectedly but you certainly could have been a little less selfish. I only asked you to take a picture with me, and my mother, and my father, and my father and me, and my mother and me, and my mother and father and me, and my uncle and my father and my father and my mother and my uncle. It only took 35 minutes of your time! And when I offered you that 15th cigarette you declined!? I spent 45kuai on the dog soup.

You should have eaten at least 4 bowlfuls but you stopped at 3. Did you see how embarrassed I was? I tried to do everything to make you happy! I even paid for everyone to go sing karaoke for 17 hours. You can’t even being to understand my embarrassment when, after hour 4, I went to the bathroom after my brilliant rendition of old revolutionary songs and I saw you relaxing in the lobby.

The China Bubble E-mail
City Life - Blogs & Columns
Written by Vitaliy N. Katsenelson
The China Bubble's Coming -- But Not the One You Think. Financial commentators are obsessively debating whether the recent rise in the Chinese stock market means there's a bubble -- and if so, when it's going to burst. My take? Who cares!

What happens to the broader Chinese economy is what we should really be watching. It will have a far-reaching impact on the rest of the world -- much more far-reaching than a decline in stocks. Despite everything, the Chinese economy has shown incredible resilience recently. Although its biggest customers -- the United States and Europe -- are struggling (to say the least) and its exports are down more than 20 percent, China is still spitting out economic growth numbers as if there weren't a worry in the world. The most recent estimate put annual growth at nearly 8 percent.

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